Headaches and Heartache
by adddicted2fiction
Summary: Being severed from the link the Doctor and Rose had had before they were separated by dimensions means Rose has a constant headache. The only thing that can help is a room which Rose prefers to stay away from.


She hadn't noticed it at first, when her grief was so enormous and her eyes so constantly wet that a constant headache was the least of her worries. But after she had stood in Norway and been told 'you can't' and something in her sparked with determination, the headache was noticed. And it clicked when she realized that it had faded on the beach but had come back as soon as they drove away: it was being a universe away from her Doctor, their telepathic connection being torn apart that had done the damage.

Looking back on it, she realized she probably should've figured it out sooner, or at least talked to a doctor about it, but self-care hadn't really been a priority to her at the time.

Finding what relieved her constant migraine had come shortly after the find of the cause. So far, Rose had managed to avoid coming up there by burying herself in work on getting back home, but there was only so much she could take. Every day it seemed to get worse, and ignoring it was getting harder and harder.

Rose rubbed her temples, begging her headache to go away. She knew quite well what would help, but refused wholeheartedly to even go near there. Well, part of her did, anyway.

After taking some aspirin which really only dulled the pain a tiny bit, she continued on with her work, trying to ignore the ache. Slowly, her resolve was crumbling. Gnawing on her lower lip, Rose sighed. Before she could stop herself, she was shoving all her current paperwork together, grabbing her laptop along with her trusty pencil and heading out of her office, to the lift. On her way, she passed a few people but didn't stop, only smiling and forcing out a chipper hello.

Once she was sealed away in the, thankfully empty, elevator, Rose let her happy facade drop, replaced by her usual tired expression as she moved to press the correct floor's button. The lift began to move, and with every floor that passed, her headache began to fade the tiniest bit.

Finally, the doors opened with a ding, and she stepped out. Painfully, a reminder of the day she met the Doctor surfaced. Her, wearily stepping out of the elevator to the basement of Henrik's, minutes away from meeting the man she'd fall– Rose shook her head. She couldn't let those thoughts continue; she had to be strong.

It was too late. Though she had managed to bury the memory, the feeling of loss that had become so familiar had already wrapped itself tightly around her heart.

Rose continued on into the room that she had come up there for, her headache almost non-existent as she settled against the wall she had pounded so fruitlessly on when she was first trapped in that universe. The place that, since there had been a crack between universes at, allowed her mind to be a bit closer to home and therefore less strained.

She opened her laptop and popped in her earbuds, pulled up her folder of various notes and research she had done and started up her music. Everything was going smoothly, if not more, since she didn't have a massive migraine to deal with. She even had a new, promising lead she was researching. Thoughts of her current setting faded.

Until she hit a dead end. Again. Rose bit her lip. Frustrated tears sprung to her eyes and she fought them back desperately. She refused to cry; it certainly wasn't the first time a seemingly good idea had turned out to be crap. But, the room she was in, put with the facts that she was a little sleep deprived and alone made it harder to just move on from it.

A tear escaped. After quickly wiping it away, she pulled out her earbuds, set her computer off to the side, and shut it.

Closing her eyes, she sucked in a deep breath. It had only been a few months. She'd find something. Rose tried to reassure and comfort herself, but it was no use. A small part of her, the part that she had stored all of her grief and doubt into before shoving it deep, deep down had already crawled its way back up. The strong parts of her seemed to disappear, and Rose let them.

Rose's eyes opened and more tears rolled down her face. _God, what am I doing?_ She thought. _I don't even have my A-levels; how am I supposed to find a way to cross dimensions?_

There was no stopping them now, tears streamed down her face. Rose hung her head and let herself sob freely.

In the back of her mind, she heard the elevator signal someone's arrival. However, this didn't fully register with her until she heard a voice call out. Rose raised her head and tried to stifle her sobs, just in time to see her mum entering the room.

"Oh, sweetheart," Jackie said, at the sight of her daughter. Rose's tears could not be stifled any longer, and she began to cry once more. Jackie hurriedly moved to sit down next to her. As soon as she was able to, Rose pulled her mother in for a much-needed embrace, which Jackie returned immediately.

When Rose quieted, her tears fully under control, she pulled back a bit. "It's just. I'm no scientist. I didn't even finish high school. How'm I supposed to find a way back to him?"

"Now don't you talk like that. When you were sent back to me in that TARDIS of his, you didn't give up. Mickey n' I were telling you to, but you still didn't. And what'd you do? You found a way back to him. And back then, you only had a truck and a chain. Now, you've got Torchwood and more experience. You'll find something, sweetheart. You always do."

Rose smiled and pulled Jackie in for another hug. "Thanks, mum," she whispered. They separated and Jackie stood up, grabbing her bag before offering a hand to Rose.

"Anyway, c'mon. Lunch. My treat."


End file.
